The Detroit Post
Monday, 29 November, 2021

Why Are Cats Better Than Dogs Joke

Danielle Fletcher
• Thursday, 15 October, 2020
• 16 min read

Cats rub your leg when they want affection, not when they're horny. Dogs use your leg. In 1996, over 10,000 US deaths were attributed to a dog owner'choking on saliva during morning makeup licks.

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Dogs just crash right in front of the screen. Fewer cat owners suffer from 'Floppy Tail' lacerations than dog owners. No one has ever had to “Beware of the Cat”. Cats have better things to do than stick their nose in your crotch.

Sherry grew up watching her uncle raise turtles, fish, goats and sheep in his backyard. As an old joke goes, this is how a dog thinks about its owner(s): “This person's great.

Cats vs dogs have been a topic of debate for thousands of years. As much as the personality characters attributed to cat lovers and dog lovers is vague, an invisible line remains between these two types of people.

Cats are the type of pet that will snuggle you to show love rather than drool and lick your face. They make you work to have a relationship with them and that is the most attractive part about having them as pets.

Most cats are pretty lazy that they like to sleep for 16 hours a day. Cats curiosity allows you to play with them even with a crumpled piece of paper rolled into a ball.

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Toss it about the room and that will suffice to keep their energy levels high. All they need is a bowl of food and another of water, and a litter box.

Rodents and pest control is the skill happily mastered by cats. Cats can do their business in the litter box that is easy to clean.

You can go to work for 8 hours straight and your cat may not miss you or at least make a mess of it. Although they love the attention they are extremely content spending time alone.

What makes cat better than most pets is that they can become your companion and not a baby needing attention all day. Barking and growling are two of the main reasons for people relinquishing dogs to shelters in the US.

With cats home, you will not have to worry about the neighbors complaining about your pet disturbing their peace. Cats by nature are calmer, so when you have people over, they will just watch from a distance.

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Dogs chew furniture, shoes, and other things in the house they are kept for care. Cats also spray in the house and maybe bite and chew with their little mouth.

One could say a cat can scratch furniture, but regular clipping of their nails and adding scratching posts in some corners of your house will solve this problem. Even keeping a single dog needs a lot more space.

Not only do mother cats nurse their kittens, but they also teach them to use the litter box, how to sharpen claws and whatnot. For dogs, this responsibility is upon the owners to teach puppies things.

Dog escaping from the house or yard is a huge problem, whereas such a situation is less stressful for cat owners. Leave the cat to walk around the neighborhood and be worry-free because it will come back home.

They can sit on your lap, lick your face, spend time hiding and do cute tricks. Many people think that dogs possess higher intelligence because of their ability to listen to commands and do tricks.

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On the other hand, cats can take charge and be independent and cautious, which are both trademark signs of intelligence. The truth, I believe is that intelligence like many other qualities of a pet is what their owners perceive them to be.

This is based on the studies that have shown that dogs release the “love hormone” oxytocin upon interaction with their owners. However, several studies have shown that cats develop affection towards their owners.

But, this is related to the time and effort the cat owner invests in it, in terms of bonding. John Camus mentions in his book named Of English Dogs that a dog placed to the chest will ease an ill-stomach or disease of the torso by the virtue of its heat.

(Source: Medieval Pets by Mainly Walker, page 9) This statement seems almost funny today, especially given the effect that zoonotic viruses have had on human populations and the fact that some researchers have suggested viruses like measles were evolved from the distemper virus that was passed to humans via animals like the dog.

(Source: Animals, Disease, Human Society Joanna and Swabbed, 1999) Labels for a cat person: Graceful, subtle, independent, thoughtful, mysterious, more neurotic, open.

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Labels for a dog person: loyal, direct, kind, faithful, utilitarian, helpful, a team player, more extroverted, agreeable, conscientious. This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

Written by Christina Donnelly When deciding to get a pet, it may be a difficult decision about whether to choose a cat or a dog. Cats have many favorable traits, including their ease of care, cleanliness, and adorable antics, making them a wonderful pet for any family.

Cats, however, are perfectly content lounging, napping, and playing with their toys at home alone while you work the day away. Not only are cats much safer indoors, but they're perfectly happy perched next to a window or curled up in a sunny spot on the couch.

Simply crack a window for some fresh air (but make sure it's not open wide enough for kitty to escape), and your cat will be totally content watching birds and bugs all day long. Susan Sheldon/Eye/Getty Images Both puppies and kittens require an incredible amount of time, energy, and attention.

Between getting, it comfortable in its new home, introducing it to its new diet, and starting some preliminary training, you may be a little sleep-deprived during the first few weeks with your new pup or kitten. It'll keep the kitty wrangled in one safe space and, due to its smaller size, it won't be able to cause much (if any) damage from being contained.

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GK Hart/Nikki Hart/Getty Images While it may be a little weird that your cat pees and poops in strategically placed boxes all over your house, cleaning out a litter box is far easier than having to take walks late at night, during scorching summer days, or through freezing snow, all while scooping up dog poop with a plastic bag over your hand. Although house cats aren't necessarily being hunted by predators, humans can reap the benefits of neat, clean, and completely covered waste.

You may want to groom it with a brush every once in a while and definitely clip its nails as needed, but otherwise, cats do a very good job of keeping themselves clean. Tom One/Picture Press/Getty Images Sometimes after a long, stressful day at work, you may not be in the mood to have a dog at your heels, following you around the house, nudging you to play fetch.

While cats may get a bad rap for being cold or distant, they really just understand (and appreciate) the concept of personal space. Cats don't require your constant attention or energy, which will give you plenty of opportunities to sit and relax after a long work week.

Yes, you may have heard that dogs are man's best friends, but here are all the reasons why cats actually make for far better pals. Shutterstock a team of researchers from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology and Princeton University revealed in 2010, cats drink water far more efficiently than dogs do.

A dog, on the other hand, will sloppily crash its tongue into the water bowl like a cannonball. ShutterstockAccording to the Animal Humane Society, average adoption fees for kittens and cats start at $32 and can run as high as $270.

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Shutterstock average, Pets WebMD says a domestic cat will usually weigh around 10 pounds. In fact, Pet WebMD says a domesticated cat, on average, will live anywhere from 10 to 15 years.

Shutterstock you want to conjure some instant revulsion, just think of the words “wet” and “dog.” You know exactly what odious scent I'm talking about, and you know just as well that few things offend the olfactory nerves as much as a aroma of a damp dog.

ShutterstockShutterstockBefore you judge a cat's sleeping habits, know that these long hours are borne less out of laziness and more out of evolutionary coding. Cats are natural predators; unlike other mammals, who may have foraged for food, felines had to hunt, which meant spending large chunks of the day asleep, conserving energy to chase down their next meal.

This is all to say: Your cat is basically a terminator with fur, and we'd be overrun with rodents if not for their valiant effort regulate the vermin population. Shutterstock may assume all of this wanton death leaves a negative impact on the environment, but ecosystems are well-adjusted by now.

The tongue of a cat is barbed in a way that removes dirt and grime from fur with startling efficiency. Her sister in folklore, Mehmet, the warrior goddess of healing or the hunt (again, depending on the dynasty), was thought to have blown Egypt into existence with her breath.

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We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide social media features, and analyze our traffic. Agree It’s the eternal cats vs dogs debate, one that both sides are equally passionate about and one that can never really be settled.

Nevertheless, there are some strong arguments for an emphatic victory in the battle of the pets, and the beautiful cats are smarter, cleaner, and better at looking after themselves. With some careful introductions and a little of luck, cats and dogs can live together in relative harmony.

Let’s start off this somewhat scientific review of some unscientific questions with a quick disclaimer: Before I dove in the pool of luxury that is the life of a freelance writer (obviously specializing in satire) I spent about 10 years as a shelter manager and career animal advocate. For instance, as reported in Psychology Today, researchers at the University of Florida took a deep dive into the psychology of cat lovers vs. dog lovers by removing people who liked both dogs and cats from their sample, isolating personality characteristics of people who prefer only one or the other.

They found the average cat person to possess personality traits of “shy, solitary, impersonal, serious, and nonconformist, but also creative, sentimental, independent, and self-sufficient.” Dog people, the researchers found, had converse personality traits of “grounded, pragmatic, and dutiful, as well as warm, outgoing, sociable, expressive, and group oriented.” Cats and dogs both hear better than humans but as the folks at Locust Valley Veterinary Clinic in Locust Valley, New York,, cats can hear almost one octave higher than dogs.” They also note while dogs, depending on breed, have around 18 muscles controlling ear movement (which funnels sound) cats have nearly twice as many ear muscles.

This allows cats to move each ear independently–making for superior hearing, if not listening, skills. The pet food makers at Candidate have, of course, special insight into what smells, and of course tastes, good to dogs and cats.

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They note that cats have an even better sense of smell and can identify differences between a larger variety of scents.” How is this even possible, you ask? Being obligate carnivores, they lost the ability to taste sweet things as they evolved because it just wasn’t necessary.

The special shape of cat corneas also helps them see well at night–about twice as well as dogs in low light. They specialize in movement to define things, not color– but either way, dogs can see more colors than cats.

“Both have super sensitive whiskers that help them detect the slightest change in air currents and pressure to navigate in their environment as well as to detect prey, predators and obstructions in the dark.” In addition, both cats and dogs use their paw pads to help regulate body temperature, which is pretty nifty. But any of us who have spent time with dogs and cats know that they form both long and short-term memories–whether it’s remembering where a treat was buried or associating a person or place with a bad experience.

Pet MD details some interesting facts about memory in dogs and cats that helps explain what (little) we know but overall, it’s more of a guessing game. Science Magazine notes that cats live an average of 15 years, compared with about 12 years for dogs.” The solitary nature of cats tends to keep them safe from infectious diseases not to mention the life-saving weaponry they come equipped with.

Many times, breeding leads to health problems–think breathing issues in Bulldogs, hip dysplasia in German Shepherd Dogs, and cancer in Boxers–whereas most cats have evolved naturally, keeping the traits that work best for them and shedding those that don’t. Granted, the questions explored here come from the “oft-asked” grab bag versus a truly scientific line of inquiry but for our purposes, the research is clear–science has spoken and science says cats RULE.

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My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.

Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates my capabilities.

However, they merely made condescending comments about what a “good little hunter” I am. There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight.

I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food.

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I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of “allergies.” Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking.

Sign up for membership to become a founding member and help shape HuffPost's next chapter It’s a never ending debate, one that both sides are equally passionate about and by all accounts will never really be settled.

Pet Foolery have put their point across with this hilarious new comic that lists all the reasons why ‘ cats are superior to dogs.’ And watch out for the great twist at the end! We Love Cats and Kittens is a labor of love bringing you photos, videos and stories of every kind about cats and kittens with new posts every day.

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